Poem, snippets and essays of my life

Tag: pain

  • Despair

    Despair

    The most accurate word to describe the times we are living in is despair. There are those people who can continue without noticing the darkness inside of them. Even they are stumbling. The children are feeling despair. Very little for them to do about it. Days come and go. Rain falls. I notice the children’s […]

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  • Wishes

    Wishes

    I wish I could write: “Last night I dreamed of Manderley”, but last night I dreamt of my father. It was the strangest dream I’ve ever had. I was on vacation with some friends, and I had promised my father to go on vacation with him. We were settling into our rooms when suddenly I […]

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  • The Shrink

    I keep playing tricks on my psychiatrist. I know this is insane but isn’t that why I’m seeing him? Sometimes I bring out large animal masks and when the Zoom starts present myself as a tiger or a lion. He can’t seem to stop laughing. I love this so much that I keep doing it. […]

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  • Dead or Alive

    Dead or Alive

    Every time I get sick, I think I’m going to die. A simple cold becomes the beginnings of sinus problems, which turn into a brain tumor and before I know it, I’m making the decision between cremation and burial all by myself. Then, miraculously, the cold leaves, and I forget that I actually thought I […]

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  • Two Chaise Lounges

    Two Chaise Lounges

    Under the umbrella by the pool are two quilted chaise lounges, like the rollers in factories used  to move small items to the next station. If you run your hand over them you will feel symmetry of each roll until you don’t. Their slope is inviting as one can see it’s the shape of a body unconscious waiting to be lifted upward by a parent or a lover. […]

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  • I let you haunt me

    I let you haunt me

    In the beginning I was the one with the power. Or at least I thought I was. I had such faith in the power of the sashay of my hips that I never minded walking away. I never even had to turn around to know that you were panting after me. I could hear your […]

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  • Life

    Life

    “No life guard on duty” Why not? If there were ever a time to have someone guarding your life, it’s now.

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  • Fall

                                       The Best Memory     The best Fall I remember happened outside of Paris due north near Chambord in November maybe October when the Beaujolais Nouveau was released along with me…I walked out the door of the inn we stayed in while you drank with our host. I wandered following troughs of wet leaves […]

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  • Child

    Integration There’s a moment when a child stops playing in her imagination as there is “Another” watching. The play become something other than sole imaginary play and is now “observed” play. The child comes out of her unconscious and is now conscious of her presence in the world .No one really remembers this moment except […]

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  • The bees outside my window

    The bees outside my window

    Outside my kitchen window there is a city of bees above the hydrangea bushes. The bees are like bustling helicopters whose rotor blades are very slow and synchronized with one another as if they have practiced this dance many times before. They are big bees and very fat which means they must be very satisfied […]

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