Poem, snippets and essays of my life
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Tag: nostalgia
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Swimming in my underwear
Last night I swam in my underwear. Probably many people have done this in their lifetime, but I have not done this before. I wanted to swim, it was a beautiful night, and my bathing suit was upstairs and I was downstairs, so I convinced myself that my camisole looked like a bathing suit.…
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Lying
Certain people are liars, and certain people are not. For example, every time I try to lie I start to laugh. This has been a serious disability in my life. Even when I was a child, I did try to lie to protect people around me but then I realized because of the laughter I…
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Brain Chemistry
I have a problem with abandonment. There’s no reason to ask myself why. It’s perfectly clear to me. I’ve had it all my life. I remember when my mother was dropping me off at nursery school when I was four and I told her I didn’t want to get out of the car. She said…
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I Can See the Ending
I keep trying to put my finger down on the earth and stop it from spinning. Stop it from going forward. I do this all the time even when nothing particularly wonderful is happening. I do it because I can see the ending and I know that sometimes I read the ending of a book…
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Despair
The most accurate word to describe the times we are living in is despair. There are those people who can continue without noticing the darkness inside of them. Even they are stumbling. The children are feeling despair. Very little for them to do about it. Days come and go. Rain falls. I notice the children’s…
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Wishes
I wish I could write: “Last night I dreamed of Manderley”, but last night I dreamt of my father. It was the strangest dream I’ve ever had. I was on vacation with some friends, and I had promised my father to go on vacation with him. We were settling into our rooms when suddenly I…
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Why I Changed My Mind…
“Why I changed my mind about Meghan and Harry” I’ve been looking forward to the Netflix documentary about Meaghan and Harry just like a lot of folks who are British royal family fans. It’s a harmless and pleasant pursuit during this never-ending time of “staying home with Covid” and we are all desperate for things…
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Evening splendor
So good to look out my window
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Two Chaise Lounges
Under the umbrella by the pool are two quilted chaise lounges, like the rollers in factories used to move small items to the next station. If you run your hand over them you will feel symmetry of each roll until you don’t. Their slope is inviting as one can see it’s the shape of a body unconscious waiting to be lifted upward by a parent or a lover.…
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I let you haunt me
In the beginning I was the one with the power. Or at least I thought I was. I had such faith in the power of the sashay of my hips that I never minded walking away. I never even had to turn around to know that you were panting after me. I could hear your…
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