Tag: loneliness

  • She had to stay home

    She realized she had to stay home from here on out. When she went out to social events the words hurt her ears and penetrated her brain. She was no longer one of them and had become “other”. Generally this meant instant social ostracism but they made excuses for her. She was fragile . If […]

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  • My Birth

    My mother’s father, Samuel Joseph Cawley, died three days before I was born and was buried in a paupers grave in Van Nys, California, alone and still drunk so the embalmer had it easy. My mother went into labor etherized and alone, and, hearing “ it’s a girl”, sighed into her peignoir and turned her […]

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  • Far away city

    Far away city

    Far away city with dreams that went to sleep

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  • Colonoscopy Time

    I am writing because I wanted to express my concern about the medical centers across the country that perform common procedures like colonoscopies on a daily basis. While I understand that Covid has changed a lot about how one interacts with patients, I was very disappointed to be treated in the way I was prior […]

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  • Academy Awards

    This year I find the Academy awards to be so moving that I am constantly in tears. As a matter of fact, I can’t believe I have the capacity to cry for so many hours. There’s so many things that people have said that have been so hopeful to me that I can’t believe and […]

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  • Aquatic Entertainer

    My Life as an Aquatic Entertainer.     In another life I was an aquatic entertainer because I needed to practice my breathing. I suffered from anxiety and worried nightly about remembering to breathe. I could barely sleep.Sometimes this fear kept me up for hours. Aquatic entertainers are required to hold their breath for a […]

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  • Oh Russia

    Oh Russia     Russia… I hear symphonies and underlying notes of soulful loss and pieces of Dostoyevsky and still she lumbers forward with Tchaikovsky attending to the beat and refuses to look far ahead at the leader who is stomping angrily in the snow looking for the borderline knowing this earth belongs to him […]

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  • Marla Ruzicka

    Marla Ruzicka

    Let’s talk about war. It’s so cold here that the moon withdrew itself last night. The fur on people’s dogs stopped  shedding for the day. I heard the word “honor” in connection with the memorial I saw from the second world war and I thought why is it honorable to be in a war or […]

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  • Last Night

    Last Night

    Kissed in a restaurant   I met you in a restaurant outside and I wore a coat the color of dried blood and when I saw you I knew I had already known you. Sometimes when that happens there’s no denying it. I love this restaurant. All the waiters know my name and they think […]

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  • My House

    My House

    I live alone, people think, but in fact my house has so many inhabitants I have to be careful when moving through it. There are many men lurking about in my closets and bedroom all of whom seem angry and hungry. They steal things from me like small bottles of Vodka from airplanes I’ve never […]

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