Poem, snippets and essays of my life
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Tag: depression
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Despair
The most accurate word to describe the times we are living in is despair. There are those people who can continue without noticing the darkness inside of them. Even they are stumbling. The children are feeling despair. Very little for them to do about it. Days come and go. Rain falls. I notice the children’s […]
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Wishes
I wish I could write: “Last night I dreamed of Manderley”, but last night I dreamt of my father. It was the strangest dream I’ve ever had. I was on vacation with some friends, and I had promised my father to go on vacation with him. We were settling into our rooms when suddenly I […]
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The Shrink
I keep playing tricks on my psychiatrist. I know this is insane but isn’t that why I’m seeing him? Sometimes I bring out large animal masks and when the Zoom starts present myself as a tiger or a lion. He can’t seem to stop laughing. I love this so much that I keep doing it. […]
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Dead or Alive
Every time I get sick, I think I’m going to die. A simple cold becomes the beginnings of sinus problems, which turn into a brain tumor and before I know it, I’m making the decision between cremation and burial all by myself. Then, miraculously, the cold leaves, and I forget that I actually thought I […]
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Two Chaise Lounges
Under the umbrella by the pool are two quilted chaise lounges, like the rollers in factories used to move small items to the next station. If you run your hand over them you will feel symmetry of each roll until you don’t. Their slope is inviting as one can see it’s the shape of a body unconscious waiting to be lifted upward by a parent or a lover. […]
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I let you haunt me
In the beginning I was the one with the power. Or at least I thought I was. I had such faith in the power of the sashay of my hips that I never minded walking away. I never even had to turn around to know that you were panting after me. I could hear your […]
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Life
“No life guard on duty” Why not? If there were ever a time to have someone guarding your life, it’s now.
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Words in Gardens
Garden words Stop Listen Close your eyes Feel Kiss Smell Brilliant Bring back anything good Ferns Words begin with w Mouth lips Risk it Say it Do it Be the tree’s root Fragile Temporary Contemplation Fidelity Loss Absurd There’s a garden in Scotland called “Little Sparta” and it inspired me to to be more creative […]
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August 5, 2022
Today would have been the 50th birthday of my daughter. She died five years ago. Initially, I heard nothing from her. Perhaps you think that sounds strange but it’s the truth. I always believed that I would be in touch with loved ones who had moved on to their next life. I talk with my […]
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Fall
The Best Memory The best Fall I remember happened outside of Paris due north near Chambord in November maybe October when the Beaujolais Nouveau was released along with me…I walked out the door of the inn we stayed in while you drank with our host. I wandered following troughs of wet leaves […]
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