Retirement Community

People come to my house because they think I will let them in.

So I do. Sometimes they’re drunk or on drugs or they have no money or they can’t be alone.

They are just looking for a nice place to stay for a while.

Most of the time I wish they would leave but I can’t tell them that.

I am a hospice:

I am a hostel

I am alone.

I know how to deal with being alone

but when other people come along it upsets the balance.

I want them to go but I want them to stay and be quiet.

I want them to be available for full body

warmth but only when I want it.

I have “anxious attachment”

There is no cure. No machine

No robotic surgery

No redo of childhood

Only a desperate longing

A low grade fever

All the time.