Poem, snippets and essays of my life
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Category: Relationships
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Child
Integration There’s a moment when a child stops playing in her imagination as there is “Another” watching. The play become something other than sole imaginary play and is now “observed” play. The child comes out of her unconscious and is now conscious of her presence in the world .No one really remembers this moment except […]
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The bees outside my window
Outside my kitchen window there is a city of bees above the hydrangea bushes. The bees are like bustling helicopters whose rotor blades are very slow and synchronized with one another as if they have practiced this dance many times before. They are big bees and very fat which means they must be very satisfied […]
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My Birth
My mother’s father, Samuel Joseph Cawley, died three days before I was born and was buried in a paupers grave in Van Nys, California, alone and still drunk so the embalmer had it easy. My mother went into labor etherized and alone, and, hearing “ it’s a girl”, sighed into her peignoir and turned her […]
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“The Red Kerchief” Claud Monet
I wanted him to notice me. It wasn’t that difficult to see what I wanted. In winter he stayed inside all the time. Painting. He was. All the time. Winter, always a danger to everyone, young and old. No freedom in winter. Too much freedom for him. I wandered by that day wearing red, A […]
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Imprinting
I am working on an imprinting machine and it’s kind of like Konrad Lorenz did with his ducks. Only this time everyone that wants to feel better about themselves can go through my machine and be imprinted with a more powerful, confident personality. It’s slightly painful but you forget that immediately because you take steps […]
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Starfish
No Safe Place 3 Attachment Last night between midnight and one am a Starfish crept through my dream of a beach in Maine. It was pale and faded. I couldn’t feel it. Because the starfish is losing its ability to function normally, dreams may have to be revised. Starfish are Echinoderms, belonging to the class […]
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Second Floor Window
Second Floor Window People have always asked me if I live alone? I think I must seem like a pack animal. The urge to gather warmth around me so obvious to others but I remain oblivious. From my own personal observation I notice my happiest times are when I am alone reflecting on […]
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Last Night I Saw My…
Last night no one knew if it was the sun setting or the moon rising but it was orange: hung there by a wire moving around our sky, currents of warm air lifting and lowering its round shape enough to light the narrow, soft roads crisscrossing the sandy summer peninsula. One young woman pushing her […]
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Shades of Gray
Shades of Gray When you’re a child you think everyone tells the truth. You think your mother and father will be together forever. When you see your first divorce it’s kind of like seeing your first accident. You can’t believe this could happen Sometimes people stay together because they can’t stand to be alone. […]
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