Poem, snippets and essays of my life

Category: Family

  • I Always Know

    I always know what people think. This is a blessing and a curse. It’s akin to saying I am never wrong but thankfully I stopped doing that a few years ago. I was once in Walmart with my mom before she died looking for nails, hammers, and hooks. She had never been to Walmart and…

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  • Swimming in my underwear

    Swimming in my underwear

    Last night I swam in my underwear.   Probably many people have done this in their lifetime, but I have not done this before. I wanted to swim, it was a beautiful night, and my bathing suit was upstairs and I was downstairs, so I convinced myself that my camisole looked like a bathing suit.…

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  • Untitled post 7143

    Happy Fourth of July

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  • Lying

    Lying

    Certain people are liars, and certain people are not. For example, every time I try to lie I start to laugh. This has been a serious disability in my life. Even when I was a child, I did try to lie to protect people around me but then I realized because of the laughter I…

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  • Brain Chemistry

    Brain Chemistry

    I have a problem with abandonment. There’s no reason to ask myself why. It’s perfectly clear to me. I’ve had it all my life. I remember when my mother was dropping me off at nursery school when I was four and I told her I didn’t want to get out of the car. She said…

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  • Save or Toss

    Save or Toss

    Lucinda Watson We save what we can now because there’s so little space left. It seems like there used to be so much space in the past. Now I can hardly breathe. Yesterday I noticed San Francisco had slipped partially into the bay. I was out for a walk, and I looked over the cliff…

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  • I Can See the Ending

    I Can See the Ending

    I keep trying to put my finger down on the earth and stop it from spinning. Stop it from going forward. I do this all the time even when nothing particularly wonderful is happening. I do it because I can see the ending and I know that sometimes I read the ending of a book…

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  • Despair

    Despair

    The most accurate word to describe the times we are living in is despair. There are those people who can continue without noticing the darkness inside of them. Even they are stumbling. The children are feeling despair. Very little for them to do about it. Days come and go. Rain falls. I notice the children’s…

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  • Wishes

    Wishes

    I wish I could write: “Last night I dreamed of Manderley”, but last night I dreamt of my father. It was the strangest dream I’ve ever had. I was on vacation with some friends, and I had promised my father to go on vacation with him. We were settling into our rooms when suddenly I…

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  • The Shrink

    I keep playing tricks on my psychiatrist. I know this is insane but isn’t that why I’m seeing him? Sometimes I bring out large animal masks and when the Zoom starts present myself as a tiger or a lion. He can’t seem to stop laughing. I love this so much that I keep doing it.…

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