Author: lucindaw

  • The House

    This morning the bones of the house had creaked and moaned and snapped with a ferociousness not heard before. Its flesh slapping at the restraining drywall and crying as the resident mice left for warmer climes. No one left here to feel winter coming. She wanted to raise her hand. She came once in November…

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  • Post Halloween Thoughts

    Post Halloween Thoughts   Last night was Halloween and I went to the parade in the small town where I live. I went with my two favorite friends with whom I would go anywhere particularly now. They are the most positive people and I have no idea how they do it. Sometimes it annoys me…

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  • I Always Know

    I always know what people think. This is a blessing and a curse. It’s akin to saying I am never wrong but thankfully I stopped doing that a few years ago. I was once in Walmart with my mom before she died looking for nails, hammers, and hooks. She had never been to Walmart and…

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  • anxiety help for kids! Back to free play!

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  • Swimming in my underwear

    Swimming in my underwear

    Last night I swam in my underwear.   Probably many people have done this in their lifetime, but I have not done this before. I wanted to swim, it was a beautiful night, and my bathing suit was upstairs and I was downstairs, so I convinced myself that my camisole looked like a bathing suit.…

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  • Spine Mine

    Spine Mine

    Spinal Surgery     Eight weeks ago I had spine surgery and it took 7 hours to make me less fragile but I am still fragile. I told the anesthesiologist I was anxious and he wrote I had a “psychiatric disorder” in my chart. He had black, thick hair and sat back in his seat…

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  • Untitled post 7143

    Happy Fourth of July

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  • Lying


    Certain people are liars, and certain people are not. For example, every time I try to lie I start to laugh. This has been a serious disability in my life. Even when I was a child, I did try to lie to protect people around me but then I realized because of the laughter I…

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  • Brain Chemistry

    Brain Chemistry

    I have a problem with abandonment. There’s no reason to ask myself why. It’s perfectly clear to me. I’ve had it all my life. I remember when my mother was dropping me off at nursery school when I was four and I told her I didn’t want to get out of the car. She said…

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  • Scoliosis and Stenosis: a journey

    Scoliosis and Stenosis: a journey

    Three weeks ago I had a seven hour surgery on my spine. Initially, it was supposed to be 3 to 4 hours. As the surgery began, it was clearer to my doctor that it was more complicated and would take a longer time. The long and the short of it are that I am very…

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